


Tower of Madness

by Schak



Category: A Song of Ice and Fire - George R. R. Martin, Game of Thrones (TV)
Genre: Mental Health Issues, Tower of Joy
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-12-13
Updated: 2018-12-13
Packaged: 2019-05-13 17:36:55
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death, Underage
Chapters: 1
Words: 9,405
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14753321
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Schak/pseuds/Schak
Summary: This was no tower of joy, but madness. My take on what happened in the tower in the middle of the Red Mountains from the view of a midwife that was there.





	Tower of Madness

She sat on a horse, for the first time in her life. Don't mistake, she could ride, but until now she had only ever rode on a donkey or mule. Those animals didn't need a lot of orders and directions. They know where to go and they weren't so high up. The horse was faster, too fast for Obara's liking. In her nearly fifty years she never had been that far into the mountains. She had traveled a bit. Up to five villages away did they call for her, if somebody expected a difficult birth. Obara was a midwife, one of the best, if not the best here. She took care of the normal people, those that couldn't pay a fancy maester. HA!, as if those knew anything about birth. They didn't even know what a woman looks down there, but they thought they knew how to deliver a baby. With five year she first pulled piglets out a sow, with ten she had turned a kit still inside the goat, with fourteen she had first cut open a cow to get the calf and sewed her up again, with eighteen she had her first daughter and half a year later she had brought another woman's child into the world. She knew what to do when a horse limps or when a child broke its arm. She knew what plants to use to cure an infection before a man was taken down from a cut. She was once even called when a knight's wife had a difficult birth and the maester was too green to know what to do. The fool had nearly killed the woman and babe.

And then this noble knight in his white cloak had come to her village, demanding her to come with him to some tower out here in the middle of nothing. Who does he think he was? She was the eldest of this village. People turned to her when they needed advice and when neighbors fought, she was asked to settle it. Now more than ever, with so many of the men gone, fighting a stupid war over a stupid prince and the mad king. She had asked them, how far along the girl she should look at was and if they couldn't have brought her here. But he proclaimed himself a Dayne of Starfell and ordered her to follow him. So now she was on this horse; a horse, that was far less comfortable than a donkey; and should help the Northern Whore. They hadn't told her what was wrong with her. Why couldn't they call one of their priced maesters like they normally do to take care of their noble breeding mares?

Obara had asked some questions but until now, Ser Arthur Dayne had cloaked himself in noble silence. Pah! Bloody idiot! The more surprising it was when he did start talking when they were in the middle of the mountains.

"He asked her to come and she did." He was staring ahead and his voice was less harsh and imperious than back in the village. She first wasn't even sure if he talked to her or to his horse. But because her stupid horse had a hard time to find sure steps, she didn't hear him right away. Another reason to take donkeys, they always knew where to place their feet, but a bloody kingsguard couldn't be seen on a donkey, could they?

"What?"

"The girl, Lady Lyanna, she followed him on her own. He, Prince Rhaegar, he didn't force her." He was still not looking at her. "It was her wish to come here with him."

Anger flared up in her. "And you think telling me that, is going to help? To know that the Whore happily plays come to my castle with another woman's husband while our sons and grandsons are marching to meet her brother and betrothed in battle? While her own brother and father died for her?" The knight recoiled as if hit with a whip. "I will do my business as a midwife because you pay me for it and I will take as much care as with all my patients, is it a girl, cow, ass or an animal." The knight didn't say anything else until they reached the tower.

It didn't look very joyful. At some places, it looked broken and you could see where it got repaired not long ago. He had planned this, Obara thought in disgust. He had prepared a tower to hide in with his whore. You didn't repair a tower in a few days. How long was this planned?

"How old is she?" For a moment it looked like he would ignore her question before he sighed and answered.

"Fourteen. She turned fourteen when she came here." He was still avoiding looking at her. All the way she thought it to be arrogance, but could it be guilt? Was the noble Sword of the Morning ashamed of his part in this?

"So she was thirteen when all this started?" Once again he ducked down at her words. That was awfully young. Obara knew that some noble girls are wedded and bedded as soon as they bleed; something only normal with whores. Her daughters hadn't married until they were sixteen or older. A girl so young was still growing; her body would still look more like a child than woman. And now this one had a baby in her. Was she just a child seduced by the prince and his pretty words? She wanted to hate the girl who caused all this. It would be so easy to hate a girl that shamed their Dornish princess, but maybe she was just a girl that didn't know better and now had to tell herself that it had to be true love. To make it worth it. Was she now treating this old tower as her castle? Would the girl receive her like a guest and show her to her room, giggling all the time like it is a game?

From the distance they could see a figure standing in the doorway. The bright white cloak against the dark wood of the door stood out and told her that it was another sworn brother of the kingsguard. The closer they got to the tower the more she could see of the man. He had dark hair and didn't look very remarkable. He was only slightly taller than the men of her village and had a worn out expression on his face. It made her angry. What right did this knight have to be tired, to be exhausted? Thirty-two men only from her village had followed that silver prince, all of them, she helped into the world and they didn't know how many of them would return. And these knights stood here in the safety of the Red Mountains and dare to look exhausted?

Finally they stopped in front of the tower.

"Arthur, my brother, were you successful?" The man stepped out of the shadows to greet Ser Arthur.

"Oswell." He nodded to the other man and unsettled with ease. "I couldn't find a maester, without altering too many about our whereabouts, but I found a good midwife." He gestured to her and went up to her horse to help her down. The prideful side of her wanted to send him away, the reasonable side accepted because she wasn't so sure about getting down. "I would like to introduce you to Obara Sand. Obara Sand, this is Oswell Whent, from House Whent and kingsguard." She didn't know what to do. Never before had she been introduced to some noble. The only two times she had seen any of them was when she hurried to the knight's house to help his wife and then nobody cared that she didn't know, because she saved both mother and child and when Ser Dayne had ridden into her village and demanded her to follow him. But apparently, she didn't need to worry, because after a short nod the knights were talking with each other again. "Where is Gerold?"

"He is resting for a moment. She is quiet for now."

"Ah… how is she?" It seemed like both of them avoided saying her name.

"Sleeping." So no bouncing lady to show her her room.

"Good." They both looked uncomfortable to be here as if they wished themselves far away.

"Well it doesn't really matter, because I would now like to see her." Obara had no intention to wait around for the girl to wake up on her own, but the two knights' eyes widened.

"You do not have to hurry yourself ma'am Obara. You can rest first and look after her later." Dayne hurried to explain.

"Yes, we prepared a room for you, please let me show you." The other one, Whent added.

"Fine." She agreed and the two immediately showed her a room one stair up. It was only slightly smaller than her house, but with only a few furnitures in it. There were a bed and a desk with a chair, some cupboards on the wall, but the rest was empty. On one cupboard there was even a bowl of water. To have so much empty space you either had to be very poor or really rich. "Do you have a well close by for water?" She placed her bag with the herbs on the desk. There were paper and ink placed on it. How considering of them, not that she could read or write.

"Yes, fifteen miles from here is a well, we ride there every day to get water." They seemed more relaxed now.

"How much do you get each time?"

"We take all the horses there to let them drink and two are carrying a barrel back." They answered eagerly as if they wanted to impress her, but all Obara could think of was that it sounded like a waste for so few people. "We will now leave you alone so that you can refresh and rest." They left her.

The bed was a lot softer than what she was used to and after only an hour or two, she was up again. It was too soft for her liking. Did all the nobles sink into their beds like this? The evening sun shone through the window. Fine glass was held by an iron case and you couldn't open it, apart from a handle that put the highest row of window tilts ajar.

She got up and prepared her bag to check on the girl. She wanted to see if the girl even knew what she did. Once she stepped out of the door she didn't see any of the knights, but a couple of doors.

The first one was to a bedroom, probably of one of the knights. The next doors she checked were a washing room and another bedroom. She went down the stairs; maybe the girl couldn't walk the stairs so easily anymore. But down there she only found the kitchen and another bedroom. When she carefully opened this one she saw a huge figure on the bed. Next to it leaned a sword. So that must be the other knight they talked about. She closed the door without a sound and went the stairs up again, this time a floor higher.

There she found a door that led to another washroom and probably the biggest room in the tower. This was probably where the girl stayed. And true, when Obara opened the door, she could see a small female figure on the bed. She lay on her back and her belly stood out. She was pregnant for some months now. She was still sleeping and so Obara took the time to look at the room. It was really bigger than the rest, but not as big as she expected, probably because of the other door she saw at the far side of the wall. The room even had more windows. Four in total, but some of the window tilts were broken and repaired with thin pieces of parchment. That seemed strange to Obara and now that she looked, other things seemed strange as well in the room. There was a chair next to the bed, but not to the window. The sewing ring looked like it wasn't touched in quite some time and the needle was missing.

Finally she looked at the girl; a thin blanket was pulled over her up to her neck and spilled over the three sides of her bed. Her dark hair was unkempt and wild and her eyes looked sunken in. She had a scratch on one of her cheeks that was mostly healed. Obara shook her shoulder until she woke up. She wasn't gentle while doing this.

The girl woke up with a scream and tried to rear up, but something was holding her back. Her eyes roamed around the chamber until they landed on her. "Who are you, you old hag?" she screeched, "What are you doing here?"

The voice was so shrill and accusing that Obara had to take a step back. What was going on here? The girl tried to sit up, but she was held down by her hands. Was she tied to the bed?

The loud screams apparently were loud enough to summon the knights into the room. Ser Arthur stormed into the room without knocking and the other knight, the one she had seen sleeping followed shortly after. They were relieved after they saw her still in bed. Ser Arthur stepped away, obviously uncomfortable with the situation.

"Did you cocksuckers and pillow biters bring her here?" She screamed and cursed at the knights. She spat in their direction before fighting more aggressive against her bonds.

"Well, she is clearly not the maester we hoped you would bring with you, Arthur." The older knight said, ignoring her profanities.

"She is a midwife. The best in the surrounding villages, Gerold. Searching for a maester would unavoidably alter people about our whereabouts." Only looking at the other knight, Gerold, and not meeting the eyes of neither her nor the girl. And how arrogant of him to think, the people in her village now didn't know where she was. Everybody knew about the old tower here and where else would they take her.

"Midwife?!" The girl screeched. Lady Lyanna was her name, right? Not that there was anything ladylike to that girl right now. "I don't need a midwife. I'm not bringing this thing, this monster to the world!" She spat out. "My brother will come here and rip it out of me before that! He'll come and save me and he'll put all of you to the sword and burn your villages to avenge our father and brother!" She looked crazier than Obara had seen anyone look in her life.

"Ah, you are right, that should work. Good ma'am, maybe we should continue this conversation somewhere less noisy." He held the door open for her and gestured her to step out of this room, treating the girl's words and threads as nothing more than a barking dog.

What was going on in this tower? Tower of joy? Ha! More like the tower of madness.

Obara followed the knights downstairs and even on the ground level she could hear the faint noise of her screaming and fighting against the bonds. They sat down at a table and Ser Arthur offered to get something to eat and drink, practically fleeing from the conversation to take place.

"First let me tell you that we are grateful for your help in this matter." He spoke polite and thoughtful. Help in that matter? Obara didn't want anything to do with this. Whatever the matter was. "My name is Ser Gerold Hightower, Lord Commander of the kingsguard. You already know Ser Arthur Dayne, Sword of the Morning and I assume you met Ser Oswell Whent as well." She could only mutely nod. This seemed so unreal. "Very good." He paused for a moment before continuing. "-the g- woman you met just now is Lady Lyanna Stark. I fear she is not of sane mind at the moment. We apologize for that. She is not always so…" He stopped again as if we tried to find the words to explain. "-outrageous. Most the time she is calmer, don't worry."

"What happened? Ser Arthur told me, that she was here on her own agenda." Obara interrupted him and he looked mildly put off by that, but she didn't care. This didn't look like she was here on her own free will.

"I wasn't there when she came here, but I can still assure you, that's true. She, without doubt, followed Prince Rhaegar here on her own. And she lay with him willingly. But I fear, she took the news of the dispute in King's Landing and the resulting fate of Lord Richard Stark and his son Lord Brandon not very well. She has been disturbed since then." He made her reaction sound ridiculous and avoided to call her father and brother exactly that, as if he hoped that she, Obara, would forget about it.

"That happened nearly a year ago. She can't be further than six to seven month. We, the small folk, hear about it a year ago." She didn't ask the obvious question out loud. But he could hear it quite clearly anyway and seemed conflicted if and how he should answer this question. The silence stretched longer than comfortable before he broke it.

"The Prince thought it better not to trouble her with the realm's matters…" Once again he paused and looked towards the kitchen door. Ser Arthur really took long to get those things. "She heard about it when I arrived and told the Prince that his father expects him back with a Dornish army."

"And you stayed and did what?" Cage her?, she silently added.

"Following the Prince's orders." He sounded harsher than before as if he denied any wrongdoing on his side. He was just a dutiful knight following orders. "She was expecting with his child. What else was there to do?"

"Moon tea." She answered immediately. "It is not difficult to come by at all. And it didn't look like she wants to keep the child." Her words raised his anger.

"This child is of royal blood and the Third Head of the Dragon. It was no longer her decision to make, but the Prince's." He stood up from his seat and smashed a fist on the table between them. Would have any man from her village said that to her, she would not only shut him up, but have him beaten by the people of the village to teach him a lesson, but he was a knight with a big sword and she was alone, so she kept silent. She was just looking at him. Not objecting, not agreeing. His anger faded and he looked at his still empty wine cup. "She tried to kill herself and the babe. That's why she is tied to the bed. We can't leave her alone. She once tried to jump from the top of the tower. Oswell was there just in time to pull her back. Another time she smashed some of her windows and tried to cut her belly open." Falling back into his chair, he started to talk, but not necessarily with her, it sounded more like he just needed to talk about it. "She once claimed that she wanted to make a blanket for the child, but instead swallowed all of her needles. We can't even leave her alone in her private rooms. Sometimes she seems calm and like she got her sanity back, telling us that she understands that it's not the babe's fault that she overreacted, that she is happy to have her, the next day we have to cut her down because she tries to hang herself with her sheets." His shoulder slouched down.

"I see." Because what else could she say to the man in the shining armor and sharp weapon? That he was driving a girl, nearly a child insane? That they were the bad ones here? The ones that lost their minds?

"If only she had never come-" He stopped himself, straightened up again and started again. "Whatever. We would like you to look after the g- after the Lady Lyanna. A female and a mother as company will do her good." He all but downright ordered her to be a mother figure to the girl. "And when the time comes, you will help to bring the princess to this world." That made Obara pause. Why was he so sure it would be a princess, apart from the fact that even if it was a girl it would be a bastard? "Of course you will be paid for your service." He placed a pouch filled with coins in front of her. She looked in it and they were all golden dragons. Never in her life had she held so much money at once. "The rest when everything is done."

She nodded and put the pouch away fast. "Why are you so sure it's going to be a girl?" She needed to know what was going on here.

The knight hesitated for a moment. "Prince Rhaegar is sure of it. A prophecy told him that this one would be the Warrior Queen Visenya reborn, to complete Prince Aegon's song of ice and fire. She is needed to save the realm."

Did he really believe that? Did they throw the whole realm into turmoil and war for same foolish words? Lust she could understand, call it love if you want to sing a song about it, but prophecy? Obara knew about prophecies. She had told some before. To the smith that kept eyeing the too young girls, she told him that the Seven that are One will punish him should he do as much as lay a finger on one of them. In his own forge, he will burn, but not before burning hot tongs would rip off his bullocks. She knew this prophecy would be true because she would make it come true. But this over a prophecy? Her boys could die for this!

"What are the prophecy's words? What does it say?" She demanded this answer.

"I- I don't know. I never read it, but the Prince did. Again and again, until he understood it. He is a great and wise man." Did he truly believe that or did he tell himself that to justify his own actions?

"Do you all believe that?"

"Yes, of course."

"Aha!" It was half acknowledging his words and half laughing at them. And out of nowhere the girl appears like the sane one! "If you would excuse me, I will see what takes Ser Arthur so long and bring some food to the girl." She didn't wait for the answer and left the room.

In the kitchen she found Ser Arthur sitting at a small table with a cup of wine and an half-empty bottle next to him. An untouched plate with some fruits, cheese, and bread stood on the table as well. When he heard her enter he looked up and for maybe the first time met her eyes. He smiled sheepishly at her and raised his cup.

"It seemed like I got lost in time. I apologize."

"More like lost in wine." He laughed at her words as if they were the zenith of wit. She went to the stove to light a fire and filled a pot with water. She sat down across from him and he offered her a cup of wine as well. For minutes they just that there in silence before she asked: "Do you believe it?" She couldn't say why she asked, but she needed to know.

"What?" He refilled his own cup.

"The prophecy." She took the cup. The wine was sweet and heavy. "Do you believe in it? Do you believe that the child in her is the key to some world-saving?"

"Ah, that." His time to look her in the eyes was over. "Ay." He didn't sound very convinced. "Have to, or else…"

"Or else you are the man that enabled this war? That let a mad dream bring death to thousands?" He recoiled again.

"Ay…" He emptied the cup in one gulp. The water was boiling and she took it from the fire. From her bag, she added some herbs and dry fruits to it and placed it on the tray together with two cups.

"I'll take that to the Lady Lyanna." She left the kitchen before she could throw the hot tea in his face.

She expected to be insulted and spit on by her new charge, but the young lady seemed surprisingly dolce. She watched her step in and sat down the tray without saying a single word, just watching her out of the corner of her eyes. And now Obara was confronted with an unusual situation. She didn't know what to do. When she rode here, Obara imagined confronting the Northern Whore, made her see the consequences of her actions. But how could she do this with this pitiful, broken girl? A girl that lay the blame for her families deaths at her own feet and those of her unborn child.

She sat down on the chair next to the bed. An introduction would probably be a good point to start. "Hello, I'm Obara Sand." What should she do now? Wait for her to answer? Or something else? The girl just watched her. Maybe being honest would help most. It sounded like she didn't have too much of that here. "The knights paid me to take care of you. I didn't know how you-" lived? Were kept? "They didn't tell me about this." She gestured towards the girl. Obara fell silent and waited for her to say something. It took a long time until the girl- Lyanna she reminded herself, she should call her by her name- finally spook. Her voice was hoarse from her screams earlier.

"You are a midwife." She couldn't detect any emotions in these words.

"Yes, I'm."

"I don't need one. Leave!" Fury took over her face again. "I won't bring anymore dragonscum into the world! My brother would not let it happen!"

"Maybe, maybe not. But until then, I think you could need someone to keep you company." She couldn't help but feel pits for the- for Lyanna. Her sunken, half-crazy eyes looked at her in surprise. They even cleared a little bit. "At least some other company than those knights, who believe that baby in your belly is some kind of presaged savor and that's reason enough for your suffering."

"You- you don't believe…?" Lyanna's face twitched between different emotions before settling on awe or was it hope?

"No, I don't believe it. A prophecy is only as good as the people trying to fulfill it and putting half the realm to the sword sounds like a bad start for a savior." Obara saw how laughter bubbled up in her. Shaking the tied down body uncontrollably. In a short time, it tumbled over to a maniac laughter with tears streaming down her face. At one point the laughter died and she was only crying, mumbling incoherent words. For minutes Obara just sat there and waited. After she finally calmed down Obara changed the topic. "I will now untie you, so we can eat something and drink a tea together."

The ropes they used to tie her down were out of soft silk; never the less they already left some dark bruises where she fought against them. For now, she didn't do anything about it. T- Lyanna didn't trust her yet, and how could she? This will wait for another day. Like other things had to wait for another day, Obara thought as she looked at her swollen belly.

The next couple of days were not much different. Obara spent time with Lyanna, without even mentioning that she was pregnant, but she looked after all those small wounds and bruises. They both pretended like there was no growing belly. Lyanna thanked this care with affection, leeching on her with desperation. It was days later when Obara smeared a herbal cream into Lyanna's hair to be able to brush the unkempt hair again when the little lady brought it up.

"Obara, you are good with herbals and teas and such." She sounded nearly nervous.

"Ay, I learned it from my mother and grandmother."

"Can you- can you make moon tea." Obara stopped for a moment to brush the long dark hair with her fingers.

"Ay, I can." She didn't want to say too much now.

Lyanna turned around and hope shone in her eyes. "Make me some. Please. I want to wash this shame out of me."

"To do that I will have to take a look first."

Lyanna paused for a moment, before nodding. She stripped down to let Obara look at her belly. It was a strange picture. The pregnancy made some womanly curves appear on her chest and the belly was popped onto her slender form. The hips were still narrow and boyish that worried her greatly.

"When was your last moon blood?" Carefully she touched the round belly.

Lyanna blushed and looked away. "Not sure." Obara raised an eyebrow at her. "I- I lost count of time…"

"Ah… Can you tell me how long before the P- before you heard about y- before Ser Hightower arrived here?" She searched for the babe's position in her.

"Maybe a month and a half before… Ah!" With more force she pressed down between her hip's bones, digging her fingers deep into her pale flesh.

"Sorry. When did you have your first moon blood?" She was a strange picture to look at. With half her hair combed and washed and the other half still wild and unkempt with the slimy herbal pasta in it.

"Two days before my thirteen's name day." She really didn't like how narrow the hips still were. Tiny boyish girls should marry later than the big once with a wide ass. That was what she always told the people in her village.

"How long between your moon bloods? Were you very regular?"

"Not very. Sometimes I had them after twenty-seven days, sometimes after thirty-eight."

"Ah…" She didn't like this at all. This pregnancy was too soon, she was too young. This wouldn't be an easy birth.

"So when can you make me the moon tea?" For the first time since she met Lyanna her grey eyes were alive and vivid. A small smile transformed her face from that of pure misery into the pretty face of a beautiful maiden. So this was the girl that caught the Prince's attention.

"I will have to ask the knights how long it was since then." She avoided answering the question directly. "Put your clothes back on and let us finish your hair."

Obara avoided returning to her chamber until the next day. How could she explain to Lyanna that she would not be able to help her with that? That she can't give her moon tea? But she had to do it.

The next morning after helping her wash and dress, she said the girl down.

"I can't give you moon tea." Even if she wanted to look away Obara forced herself to look her in the eyes.

"What? No! You have to!" She screeched.

"It's too late. It would not wash away…" Her voice was calm as she tried to explain it. "The baby would stay; it would only make it retarded to drink moon tea now."

"No, no, No, NO!" Lyanna shouted, pulling on her hair. She jumped up and started to walk around, like a caged animal. She mumbled under her breath until she turned back to her. "You don't understand, I can't have this thing. Please make it go away."

"I can't" Obara felt her voice break under her emotions.

"You have to. Please…" She begged her now, kneeling down in front of her. "I don't care if I die, as long as it dies, please."

Obara embraced her and for a moment she really thought about giving her a poison that would make her fall asleep and never wake up again. "They would kill me if I do that. The knights, they would kill me and call it justice."

Lyanna recoiled from her and spat at her. "Coward!" And threw the tray with the teapot at her. Luckily it was nearly empty, but the hot tea still burned one of her hands that she had raised to protect her face. "Fucking coward! You are no better than those fucking white cocksucking whores!"

Speaking of those, the one that kept guard outside the door stormed in. They normally didn't, but maybe she had screamed when the tea flew in her face. He looked at everything and called for his friends before trying to hold her still. It was surprisingly difficult for the man, Oswell, to hold the small girl still. She kicked and bit and clawed into his hands. When the other two arrived they battled her down on the bed and tied her up again, like they did every night. She screamed and cursed for hours to come until her voice was hoarse. Obara listened from her room downstairs and felt tears run down her face. Tears of pity for a poor lost mad child, captured in her tower of madness.

For days Obara had to talk to her and calm her down after that. Fed her soup and tea against her will. Heard her curse and making dark promises.

"This thing will die! One way or another! Either my brother will rip it out of my womb to purify me again! Or he will toss it into the desert so that the sandstorm and vultures can pick it clean! He will not stand for this shame on House Stark! He is a wolf and he will take revenge for me!"

The words and screams hunted Obara into her dreams. She saw this terrifying creature in her dreams. A man with the bloody teeth of a wolf. With his claw-like hands, he sliced babies' bellies open. Leading an army of savages against her boys. She saw that even the knights were not unaffected by this. The dark circles under their eyes grew darker. When she was calmer for a bit, Obara dared to asked Lyanna about it. If she really thought her brother to be able of kinslaying. The door was always ajar in this time so that the knights could react fast. She could see how Ser Dayne listened carefully to the answer.

"It won't be kinslaying. There is a long tradition in the North that you can toss newborn out before you give them a name and present them to the gods. Especially bastards! Kin is only who is claimed as kin." She spat the word out in disgust. She saw the man turn as white as his cloak when he heard those words.

After that it took her a week to get closer to Lyanna again. But the girl craved to be close to another human, for another mother so far from her family and friends and even her gods. She said the old gods could only hear you in front of heart trees made of weirwood. This sounded strange to Obara, but what did she know about the old gods. Even if it would help Lyanna to feel close to at least those. She had thought about telling her how to pray to the seven, but she didn't think her Northern pride would let her even now, especially now, to pray to other gods. But it lasted heavily on her.

When she was mostly calm she was a sweet girl who loved telling stories from Winterfell and the North. At one point she even trusted Obara and showed her, her greatest possession. It was a toy and Obara nearly cried at how child like this thinking was. It was a little wolf, direwolf she said. Her father had given it to her when she was little. It was carved out of white wood and the details were drawn with some red substance. The snarling face of the wolf with it deep red eyes seemed more frightening to her than they should for a child's toy, but Lyanna loved it dearly.

"It's weirwood. That's why it's so white. It is a very hard wood and very difficult to cut, but my father made sure that I always knew that I'm a wolf." She looked like a child as she caressed the wood and pretended to ride it with two fingers.

"What is this red made out?" Obara saw that some of it was lost and rubbed away, but not the eyes.

"It's the sap of the tree. Blood red tears they cry." She explained and then she told her stories about the heart tree at home and in other godwoods. She looked to wishful when talking about her gods.

"Why don't you pray to the wolf?" Obara didn't know why she said that, but it seemed right. "It is out of weirwood and you said for the gods to listen it has to have a face." She took the wolf and turned its face towards Lyanna. "It does have a face. Maybe the gods could hear you."

That was all it took for her to hope again. She didn't stop praying to the little toy, begged and begged that the gods would not make her bring another dragon into the world. Pleaded that she would give anything not to bring Rhaegar's Visenya into the world, to prune her of this dragon seed.

Lyanna was nearly in her ninth months when Obara was with one of the knights in a village (not her village, were they afraid she would run away?) to buy more supplies. Fresh fruits and a goat with a kit. She came along, because really what did noble men knew about goats? It was there they heard about Prince Rhaegar's losing against the Usurper, about how the Demon of the Trident smashed his chest in with his war hammer. How the wolf was chasing down towards King's Landing to separate the King from his head.

It changed things. No news about what soldiers survived, how many survived, when those Dornish men could come home. You only heard about the Prince and other noblemen. Obara felt anger and fury at this. The common man died for the lords' foolishness. Dayne's face turned ash when he heard it and mumbled how it was impossible. He wanted to return immediately, but Obara had none of it. They were here because there needed some things and they wouldn't leave without them. With the goat and its kit, they were slower on the way back than the knight wanted. Once back the knights started to talk to each other. The other two didn't want to believe it either, but the truth was the truth. They fought. Dayne wanted to bring the girl to Lord Martell, as a way to protect Princess Elia. That they could offer Lyanna for the Dornish Princess and her children, but Hightower wanted to know nothing of it. The Prince gave us an order and we will follow it, he had said. Whent agreed with him. He looked at Lyanna's belly more fanatic than ever, started to talk about the Princess and how she would fulfill the prophecy and everything would turn out good.

Lyanna, on the other hand, laughed for days. She danced and sang of her brother's virtues. It took her days to realize why Obara wasn't happy with her.

"Your boys fought for that mad dragon? Why would they do that?"

"For the same reason, every common man fights, because their lord told them so. We don't want to fight for him, but we didn't have a choice."

Lyanna didn't say she was sorry, because she clearly wasn't, but she told her. "For what it is worth, I hope your boys are still alive."

When the news of the Sack of King's Landing arrived the knights looked broken. Princess Elia was dead. Her babes were dead. Killed by the Lannisters. The other parts of the prophecy were dead. The prophecy was dead. They didn't know what to do. They argued how Prince- no King Viserys was still alive and he would need a bride. Or if they should accept King Robert as their king. They couldn't decide so they stayed where they were. Dayne and Whent wouldn't wear her white cloaks anymore, only Hightower put it on each and every day. They drank more wine and didn't even bother to water it down. Lyanna was singing more and louder how her brother would come and take care of the last of the dragons here. She didn't see this baby growing in her as her child. The birth was only days or maybe two weeks away.

Mad all of them.

She sent Dayne away to get a wet-nurse for the child. He stayed away longer than thought. To the next village, it was five hours away on the horse. He stayed away for two days. He returned with a young and pretty woman, who said her name was Wylla. She said that she was from Starfell that her own daughter died after only two days. Obara told her how to massage her breasts to keep the milk going. That Dayne had gone home to get a wet-nurse. The closer to the birth they got the more fanatic did the Northern girl pray to her gods, screaming her prayers at the little toy that the girl got frightened.

When finally she went into labor, it was terrible. She fought it the whole way, refused to press the baby out. She cried and screamed and clawed at everybody that came close. So much that she had the knights tie her down again.

Obara shouted at her that she had to press, but she shook her head and pressed her legs together. Tears fell from her eyes and blood was coming out of her, but she refused to birth this child. Wylla stood next to her, afraid and unable to do a thing. For hours they tried to help Lyanna, but she wouldn't press at all. The day turned to night and day again and no shouting and begging would change anything.

They will both die, Obara realized that moment, she wants them to die.

That was what she had always wanted, to die before giving birth to this child and for a long moment, she thought of letting her. Wylla's pleas to do something to end this madness were what shook her out of it.

Madness, yes, all of them were mad, she thought, and maybe I'm as well.

She ordered Wylla to prepare hot water and to hang clean linens in the stream. One of the knights she sent to get her the sharpest knife in the kitchen and another to help her change the sheets she lay in and to burn the old one. The last knight, Hightower, just stood outside the door in his damn white cloak. She could smell smoke from the burning sheets through the window.

When the one with the knife returned, she had him holding her down. She cut the baby out of her. With swallow cuts, she when through the stretched skin of her belly and flesh. Lyanna fought and begged her not to. Blood clinched to her hands as she reached into her. Lyanna screamed and trashed as much as the bonds let her. Everybody looked sick when she pulled the slimy babe out. She gave it a smash to make it scream and immediately she passed it to Wylla, as she took a needle and thread and tried to sew her back together. At one point Lyanna passed out of exhaustion and pain. She couldn't say if Lyanna ever going to have children again, but she would try to save her life first. Once her wounds were dressed up, she turned to the baby.

"Visenya…" One of the knights mumbled in awe and it made her angry, it wasn't their right to name the child.

Wylla stood by the window and cleaned it with wet linens. Obara looked at it and a joyless laughter bubbled up in her. This was no dragon girl, but a wolf boy. From his dark wavy hair to his nose and eyes, the ears and cheekbones, all of it had Stark written over it. They had been here for nothing! This war was for nothing! She searched for a hint that his eyes would turn dark violet, but she could only see light blue eyes that would probably turn grey. Nothing of the Prince was in this babe. She had to think of the desperate pleas to clean her of the dragon seed to the little white weirwood toy wolf. Was that how her gods had answered her, by taking the entire dragon out of it? She looked around for it, but she could see the toy nowhere. Did they burn it with the sheets? The smoke from the fire rose up, she could see the fire below the tower and for a moment she could have sworn that she could hear a wolf howl from the flames, or she was going mad as well.

The others at least look at her as if she did, while she stood there with the babe in her arms giggling.

"A small boy. Congratulation!" Obara said to no one directly. The look on the knight's face was priceless.

The following days were terrible. Lyanna came down with a high fever and it clouded her mind even more. She couldn't differentiate between reality and fantasy anymore. The knights were even more shattered. They fought what to do. They argued that they could make the boy their new king, but he was just a bastard even when Prince Rhaegar wanted to legitimate the child, but then he had talked about his daughter Visenya, not a Stark looking boy. Prince Viserys was still alive, should they go there, now that Rhaegar's vision was wrong and gone. Now that they saw the errors of his ways. But once again they couldn't find a solution, an answer, so they stayed, drinking heavy red wine.

Lyanna reacted with screams most the time when somebody brought the boy near her, so he never sucked on her tits, but always on Wylla's. She was still screaming and shouting how her brother would be done with this child once he arrived, how he would toss him to the desert. That was most the times. Sometimes she seemed to forget that she even had given birth or that she was ever pregnant. Then she let the child closer to her. Cooed at him and pulled faces, but never touched him. Once Ser Arthur held the child and she woke up. They prepared for her to scream but she only laughed.

"Is that the little one my brother gave to your sister, Ser Arthur?" She had never seen the knight stood so still and pale, not even when he heard of Prince Rhaegar's death. "He looks like Ned." She giggled. "Or did she, in the end, fall for Brandon's trick to see if she is good enough for Ned? If she would give in to Brandon she could never be good enough for Ned and be left alone." The knight trusted the child into Wylla's arms and practically ran from the room.

Sometimes she seemed to realize that it was her son, but she talked like her father or brother were his father. Talking about how he was pure Stark and talked about how they had visited her in the death of the night and gave this child to her. It was disturbing how she preferred the idea of laying with one of them over the reality that was. Obara couldn't even say of what brother she talked about, the one on the way to save her or the one that strangled himself trying to save their father. Maybe both.

But most the time she screamed about having the child dead.

The fever never broke and Obara was sure that the girl wouldn't survive this. She was still bleeding from her lower parts and the wound on her belly was oozing as well. Obara once heard that the old gods were savage gods that ask for blood sacrifices. Was that the price they take for answering her prayers not to make her birth a dragon? It would be only a question of time before she would be dead. What would happen to the child? Wylla grew somewhat fond of the quiet boy, but she was somewhat scared of him, of his situation as well. As if all this could only be a bad omen for his future. Or if he even had a future accounting to Lyanna.

The knights didn't know what to do either, as if they ever had been a help in all this. She heard at least one of them cry and scream in his sleep, begging for forgiveness. She hoped the ghosts that hunted him would never stop doing so. She hadn't seen Hightower for days after the birth. He had kept to himself and never said a word.

Words reached them how the Tyrells had put down their weapons and how the wolf was on the way south. He would find this tower, Obara was sure of it. The people knew about it and just a few questions would point him here. The only question was if he would arrive before the girl dies or not.

A day later it happened. For the distance, they could see dusk clouds coming closer. Riders. Her brother Ned. Wylla asked her what they should do with the boy. It still had no name, never did Lyanna call him by any name, not even in her fantasies. It was only Wylla that had ever called him any name. Jon, after her father. Obara wanted to laugh. They had three noble men with them, one of them a Lord Commander and she should be the one that had to decide?

"I don't know. He will be here soon. We don't even have time to run." She looked down to the boy. "What ill fate did you bring with you to this world…"

"We failed all our oaks. We couldn't protect the King or Prince. We couldn't keep the King's peace. We couldn't protect the realm." It was Hightower that spook up. His voice hoarse from the days he didn't talk. "But the knight's code says to protect the weak and helpless. The children and women. Old and young." He turned to his fellow knights. "We failed everything, but that is maybe what we could do. We can protect this little boy and you women and claim some of our honor back."

Obara saw them put on their white cloaks again, the first time on weeks for some and went outside to wait for the monster that hunted all of their dreams. Their rooms still stank of wine. Wylla looked at her fearfully. 

"Put the boy in the crib and help me." Obara ordered her. "Help me to get rid of those bonds and get all the flowers we have in this gods-forsaken tower into this room. When he comes in here it shouldn't look like we let her suffer." It gave both of them something to do. They could hear voices, but not what they said and how metal hit metal. Lyanna heard it as well and started to scream for her brother.

"Ned, Ned! Please come here!" Tears run down her face, as Obara placed some flowers in her hands. Blue once, because she had once told her that blue winter roses were her favorite. Finally, the fighting sounds died down and heavy footsteps come up the tower. They could see eight bodies in the sand from their window. Wylla took the boy and hide in the washing room and Obara took a wet cloth and wiped Lyanna's face clean.

When the door burst open, she was kind of disappointed. This was the man she feared for all those months? A walking monster? She expected his teeth to be pointier and him to be bigger, but that was just a man. One covered in blood, but just a man. He didn't pay her any mind and hurried to his sister.

"Lya, oh Lya, what happened to you?" He whispered in a desperate voice, taking one of her hands in his and kissing her head.

"Ned? Ned is that you?" She whispered back.

"Yes, Lya. I'm here. I'm finally here." There were tears in his voice. He must have realized that she would not survive, that he found his sister on death's doorstep.

"I knew you would come and get me." Her voice got fainter. "I always knew."

"I'm here, I'm here. I won't leave you." He kissed her hand.

"Take me home, Ned. I want to go back to Winterfell. I wanna be home. Promise me."

"I promise." Now the first tear ran down his face as he held his sister's hand as she as slowly dying. This was the moment when the boy in the next room started to cry. He didn't cry much, but now he did.

The Stark Lord looked around in confusion for a moment before he went to the door and pry it open. Wylla stood there with the boy in her arms looking desperate and frightened.

"Is that..?" He took a look at the boy. There was no question that he was of Stark look. "Give the child to me." He ordered the wet-nurse and held out his arms. She clinched the boy to her and looked at Obara for help.

She could only shake her head and tell her "Do it." In a low voice.

Wylla started to sniff as she placed the boy in his uncle's arms, in maybe is murderer's arms. He looked down at the child and went back to his sister. Sitting down with the child next to her, while holding her hand. This was probably the closest she had let the child come to her since his birth.

Her unfocused eyes land on her brother with the child and in a half-broken voice she mumbled.

"Oh… your… ur son." And smiled at him with a hint of question in her eyes. "Right? Yours?"

Some more tears escaped his eyes. "Ay…"

"Good." She smiled a brilliant smile and whispered. "I'm tired and wan' home."

"You will. I promise you, Lya." He kissed her head one last time and she closed her eyes. The life left her at that moment. It was over, maybe. The grown man started to openly cry and cry, still holding the babe. She couldn't say when the other smaller man entered the room, but he didn't say anything either. They just let the man mourn for his sister. Finally, he looked up and looked at Obara. "What's his name?"

And she couldn't answer. What should she say? He doesn't have one so that you can toss him into the desert. That was all she ever talked off.? She opened and closed her mouth, but no word came out.

"Jon." It was Wylla's quiet voice that answered. "His name is Jon."

"Jon." He tested the name and looked down on the boy. "Hello, Jon. From now on I'm your father." He whispered to the babe and Obara couldn't help but chuckle uncontrollably, like a mad woman, like the mad woman she became here in the Tower of Madness. They looked at her in confusion.

"It's all right. Everything is fine." They had listened to the mad rumble of a mad girl and eight more men lay dead in the sand. "Before you leave m'lord, you should pull down this tower. I can show you which beams and pillars the horses have to pull away for it to crash down. Let the ghosts of this tower come to rest."

**Author's Note:**

> Disclamer: ASoIaF isn't mine and I don't earn money with this story.
> 
> A.N. I wanted to write a story where all was true. That Jon is the son of Lyanna and Rhaegar and the bastard of Ned and Wylla as his mother and where Ashara had a Stark bastard. In which she went on her own with Rhaegar and was kidnapped. And a story in which it makes sense that the kingsguard would fight with Ned when he arrived at the tower. From all people in Westron he would be the most likely to protect Jon, but they fought o death with him, because they heard Lyanna's mad shouts for months and because they wanted this chance to reclaim their honor.
> 
> Please leave a review and tell me what you think of it and help me improve my writing and storytelling.


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